Apr 20, 2010

Insomnia

I haven't quite figured out how my bouts with insomnia are serendipitous. But, I do struggle with insomnia. It's never just one or two sleepless nights. It generally lasts anyhere from a week to a couple of months at a time. I used to drink a lot of diet coke. I have it up 4 weeks and two days ago (heck yeah, I'm counting the days) and the lack of caffeine hasn't made a difference.

I fully admit that my insomnia results from my mind not shutting off. Actually, in some ways, it's my ever-churning mind that leads to serendipity. Thinking, huh? I guess I should explain...

The quote I use in the "headline" of the blog by Lawrence Block says “Serendipity. Look for something, find something else, and realize that what you've found is more suited to your needs than what you thought you were looking for.” I don't think that serendipity is having something you didn't expect be better than what you expected. I think serendipity can also be when you want something to happen and it does, but in a way that you didn't think would happen. And, perhaps in a way that is better than I could have hoped for.
I definitely believe in free choice (ie, our lives aren't predestined). But, I also believe that things happen for a reason. Or, maybe it's just a matter of looking for life lessons in the things that happen, whether good or bad.

My clock now reads 5:52am. And, believe it or not, I had a decent night's sleep. I fell asleep around 11pm and woke up around 5:30 without waking up at all during the night and without a visitor from my adorable 8 year old. I laid down the bedtime law last night. He needs to go to sleep in his own room and sleep in his own room. Of course, if he needs me, he can call to me or come wake me up. But, he can't sleep in my bed anymore. When I've discussed this with his pediatrician (it started when his dad and I separated), Dr. K said as long as it's not disruping your sleep, it's ok. Well, it had been disrupting my sleep for over three years. I just decided enough was enough. I can't be so tired all the time.

Anyway, my alarm clock is going to buzz in less than 2 minutes. A true good night's sleep would have been sleeping til my alarm goes off. But, I'm glad I had a few minutes to jot down these thoughts.

So, I guess it's time to get up and start my day. Should be an interesting day at work. I have a 3 hour training class on "Mobilizing Project Personnel". I work in Recruiting for an International Development firm. We do projects all over the world helping developing countries in various ways. That's a super-simplified explanation. My alarm just buzzed, so I'd better go. More on the job stuff another time.....

And, remember....you don't need to look for serendipity. It will find you!

No comments:

Post a Comment

Please share your thoughts.....